"When My Heart Finds Christmas"

I should update my blog a little more than once every 2 months, huh? I've been too tired to do anything lately! But we did have a great Christmas. It sucked all the energy I had left out of me. Nothing new to report really except that I've been wayyyyyyyy fatigued and still not able to sleep until about 7 or 8 a.m... it's so annoying! If you have some time, please pray for me to be able to get better sleep and during more "normal" hours! Also, my husband and I still need major healing from our battles with crohn's (and the medicines that give me bad side effects), kidney stones, back problems, migraines, and our finances to name the major issues. I know God hears all of our prayers and is always answering them. If you have a prayer request, I would love to pray for you too, just write me a message and/or a comment! I wanted to add that although we've gone through a lot this year, we've grown in our faith, our marriage, and God has always provided for our needs, and what a blessing that is. The fact that I have a warm home to live in, great supportive family, food on the table, and of course, a wonderful best friend as my husband, is so much to be thankful for.  On that note, let's all pray that 2012 will bring even more blessings and opportunities to be a blessing to others in our lives!


 Here are a few pictures from Christmas (I will not be in them as I have gained weight from one of my medications and have banned any picture-taking of me until further notice. I know, I know... it doesn't matter... but I'm just more comfortable NOT being in front of the camera at this time.) Some of the pictures are kinda blurry because they were taken with my phone, but better a blurry picture than no picture right? ;-)

 Our Christmas Tree :-)

Leila the Grinch and Daddy!

Christmas Tree Ornament

Our tree before we put the ornaments/candy canes on it!

Alex and his "Starfighter" Legos

My Niece Hannah with her new bear

Niece Samara with a present

Leila under the tree

Louie chillen' on my lap watching tv

Happy New Year!!!

~Melissa


iPod/MP3 Survey:
1. Put your MP3 Player on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS

4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got this from.

5. You don't have to put the artist.



*Okay, so I used my hubby's iPod, 1. Because I don't have one of my own and 2. We listen to most of the same music anyway (well, our tastes are a little different but more similar than not).




1. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
"The Setting Sun"- Switchfoot, hmmm...

2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
"Otherside"- Third Day

3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
"Ron Leaves" - Harry Potter Soundtrack, haha!

4. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
"He Is All"-  KJ-52

5. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"Six Beauties on the Rooftop"- Jazziz 2004 burned from a friend of ours, lol!


6. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Armistice"- Mutemath << I didn't know that word so I looked it up: a temporary suspension of hostilities by agreement of the warring parties.

7. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"That Part That Hurts The Most (Is Me)"- TFK

8. WHAT IS 2+2?
"The Great Depression"- Blindside

9. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"Far and Gone"- Day of Fire , that's not true!

10. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Great Is The Lord"- Starfield , true, true, He blessed me with my hubby!

11. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"It Can't Rain Everyday"- P.O.D.

12. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
"Lord, I Need You"- Chris Tomlin, Passion cd

13. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"We've Been At This"- The Fold

14. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"Control"- Mutemath, huh? lol


15. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Aunt Marge's Waltz"- Harry Potter soundtrack, haha!



16. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"It's Time"- Michael Buble, I guess it was time! K Lord I don't want to die anytime soon though... or have anyone play this song... lol



17. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"Silent Night"- Johnny Mathis, well, I am up all night!



18. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
"Manifesto"- The City Harmonic


19. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
"Under the Blue Skies"- One Minute Halo


20. WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow"- Herb Alpert, well, I like to look at snow but it's too cold for me so I never go out in it!



21. HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"I Give You My Heart"- Hillsong, well if you take it literally then I guess that works!



22. WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"Crack the Code"- 311



23. WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"Bravery"- Ivoryline



24. WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"Saviour King"- Hillsong United... ok this one doesn't make any sense!



25. WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"Next Thing You Know"- Matthew West



26. DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
"The Scene and Herd"- Relient K ....???



27. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
"Whole World in His Hands"- Passion: How Great is Our God



28. WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"Hiding Place"- Starfield



29. WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
"When My Heart Finds Christmas"- Harry Connick, Jr.

Happy Fall

Did you all have a good Halloween? Any good/funny stories to share? Alex and I carved pumpkins this year, and it was fun! His parents dropped off an orange and a white pumpkin with all of the carving tools & templates after we had been talking about possibly doing it this year, so we had no excuse, lol. My white pumpkin happened to be very round and hard to tape the pattern onto, and hard to photograph, and my hubby's turned out A-MAZING because he's such a perfectionist and definitely took his time on it! So mine looks like a child carved it. Oh well, it was still fun! Here are some pictures:

Taking all the gunk out... my wrist hurt after!

Hubby's kitty template

 

Poking the pattern into the pumpkin

 Carving my owl (I added the stars & moon myself :-)

 All finished and glowing!

My little owl

 I know, I know... hubster did an amazing job!

 Never carved a white pumpkin before!

 Meow.

One last picture of our carved pumpkins.

So, things have been going so-so with my and my hubby's health. My jaw pain ended up subsiding after a few days and I will be looking for an oral surgeon who would be able to take payment plans since we don't have oral surgeon coverage on our dental plan apparently. :-/. Other than that, our finances are just insane right now with Alex only being able to work a day or two a week, but God has been able to provide for us so far through our parents. We are hoping that Alex will get relief with our family friend who is a great massage therapist, and he will also be going to a greatly recommended chiropractor as soon as we find the funds for him. I would love to go too but we'll have to really pray about our finances! We have cut back on almost everything possible; We eat out pretty rarely, I make most meals at home, and if we do eat out, it is something that is just as cheap as eating at home, such as taco wagon burritos but taking them home and having our own drinks & chips with it, etc. I've been making some yummy meals that I've found online, and on Pinterest! (Add me on Pinterest if you haven't yet, I love it!)

Oh, today I finally got my spinal injections done again, and I'm hoping that it will bring lots of relief again so I can start exercising without severe pain! This horrible prednisone medication has given me INSANE stretch marks all over my body, and made me gain so much weight... I can't fit into 99% of my clothes. Part of what Prednisone does is make you store almost every calorie you eat, and it stores it mainly in your face and in your belly area. Some people also get what they call a "camel hump" which is fat stored on the back of the neck; luckily I haven't had that yet... knock on wood! I have never had a weight issue before so this is brand new to me, and I am having a hard time with it.  It's quite embarrassing when people who haven't seen me in a few months say "Wow, you look different!" (with an interesting look on their face) or "I almost didn't recognize you"... oh well, hopefully I can get further down on my prednisone dosage, although these last 5 mg's I'm on have been VERY tough; every time I go down by a little tiny splinter of the pill, I have major intestinal problems by nighttime.  And it huuuuurts. If you haven't heard of prednisone or are interested in what it does to the body, you should look it up on google! Prednisone helps a lot of people who have different inflammatory conditions like asthma, crohn's disease, rheumatoid arthritis, and other autoimmune diseases, but the longer you're on it, the more bad, bad, bad side effects you get. So it's really a catch-22. Unfortunately all the other meds I'm on for crohn's disease aren't putting this active disease under control, and it's very frustrating. Please pray that I can get off of this stuff ASAP!

Well, I wanted to fill out this "Autumn Survey" I saw on another blog since I kind of enjoy filling out surveys, but I'll post it in a separate entry. Hope all of you are having a good fall so far, and don't forget to turn your clocks back on Sunday! (I didn't even know it was this Sunday until I saw it online yesterday, lol :-)

I'm back!

My surgery went excellent! Thank you all so much for your prayers. God did amazing things and took such good care of me, and so did the dr.'s, nurses, and my hubby! I am recovering well at home and the stone was easily shockwaved into dust- my dr. told my husband that it literally broke up in the first few minutes so they didn't have to keep "shockwaving" me, which meant less pain! The anesthesiologist was great and really listened to my issues and what I needed as an individual, so that was also a big help.

The only thing now is that I'm having crazy pain in my tooth/jaw area that stared a couple days ago. I thought I narrowed it down to being an issue with one tooth, but I went to the dentist and got x-rays and an examination, and I have no cavities or issues that would be causing the pain in that area. So my dentist said it could be my bottom wisdom tooth that's pushing against the other teeth now and causing pain in different places.... or that I'm clenching my jaw at night. I'm beginning to think it's the first thing. Different parts of the right side of my upper & lower jaw will start hurting terribly, and my pain meds of course do not help enough. I just took advil (even though I'm not supposed to because it can cause intestinal bleeding, and I already have crohn's disease) to see if it will help because I am desperate! Like I keep telling people, if it's not one thing, it's another! I hate it. But I will trust God to help this resolve somehow!

Again, I am soooo thankful how everything went yesterday. I just really wish I wasn't wasting my pain meds on trying to get this stupid mouth pain better. When people like my nurses always say "wow, you are way too young to have so many health problems going on!" I always say that I'm hoping to be like Benjamin Button but with my health, only getting better with age! That would be cool, haha. I can picture my husband and I on some vacation on a tropical island when we're like 80 enjoying the time of our lives and looking back on all the illnesses we had and how much better we're doing even though we're old geezers. Hey, I can hope, can't I?! ;-)

Surgery today

I can't believe it's been almost a month since I've written anything! My health has not been good. The prednisone gives me crazy insomnia (so you think I'd have time to post a blog, right?) but I get so tired from not being able to sleep that I get into this half-asleep sort of daze and can't get anything done. I've also gained too much weight from pregnancy-like cravings from the medicine, and my face has swollen slightly due to what they call "moon face" from the drug... it reaaaaally doesn't help the moodiness to look in the mirror and see myself overweight. I have been slim all of my life so I am not used to it, and I feel so unhealthy, but hopefully I will be off of the medicine in a month or two as I taper down, and I can start walking again and eat less.

Today at around 12 noon I will be arriving at the hospital to get my largest kidney stone busted up into tiny pieces so it will be easier to pass. The surgery is called Shockwave Lithotripsy. My dr. is NOT going to place a stent this time, and I am praying and trusting in God that I will not wake up in any kind of major pain that can't be controlled. If you read this, please pray that the procedure goes perfectly, that my pain is controlled, that all the dr.'s and nurses do their jobs correctly and compassionately, and that I can go home on the same day, as scheduled and not have to stay in the hospital due to any complications or pain issues! I am so thankful for everyone and anyone who can send up a prayer for me. Although this past month has been one of the hardest for my husband and I healthwise, financially, physically, and mentally, we trust that God will bring us out of these hardships and that he has "plans to prosper and not to harm us, to give us hope and a future" (scripture from Isaiah).

I hope to be visiting your blogs soon and saying hello as I have met some really neat people through here. I better get some sleep, as it is 3:30 a.m. and I need to wake up at 10 at the latest! Bye for now!

~Melissa

Long Time, no speak

Wow have I been through a whirlwind since I last wrote 2 weeks ago. I ended up in the hospital getting surgery to remove one of my kidney stones. It turned into a huge disaster similar to what happened when I had a stone removed 2 years ago. My body couldn't tolerate the stent that was placed in the ureter (between the kidney and the bladder) to make sure that there was no swelling after surgery, and I woke up in the most EXTREME pain I have ever been in. Long story short, my urologist ended up pulling out the stent and the catheter while I was wide awake, and I was screaming and crying for over 4 hours without any relief as they maxed out all different kinds of IV meds and made sure I didn't stop breathing.  I spent the night in the ICU that night because of how much they had to give me. I also wasn't able to see my husband for 5 days- almost no communication at all- because he ended up getting the worst stomach flu he's ever had in his life, probably from taking me to the ER that first night (a nurse told me it had been going around). It was horrible not having my best friend, my partner in life, there with me like he had been the last time I was in the hospital. But I know it wasn't his fault. Luckily my parents were there by my side most of the time and a HUGE support, and I had many family members, friends, and church members praying for me & visiting.

I still have two stones (one in each kidney) that haven't started coming down yet, so if they'll stay up there, I can get them "shockwaved" (broken into little pieces by basically beating my body to bruises) in an outpatient procedure. Unfortunately, I think one of them might be moving because I'm having more pain & irritation on the left side of me and in my bladder now. But I just have to take this hour by hour, day by day.

In this post, I'm not going to go into the details of my hospital stay, or the issue of my urologist leaving for vacation that weekend and therefore leaving me with an incompetent, horrible hospitalist dr. (because there were NO OTHER urologists who work at this hospital!) who decided to tell other dr.'s and nurses that I was a "drug seeker" just because I have tons of health issues and have a higher tolerance for pain meds because of my back problems. Huuuuuuge story about her sometime in the future.... here's one little preview: She decided to discontinue ALL of my medications (for crohn's disease, pain, EVERYTHING I was taking at home); she apparently likes to take patients off of all of their meds and "start over" because SHE knows what's REALLY wrong with the patient... and it took my nurse over 3 hours that night to go through my chart history, find all of the meds that I was on, and get them all approved again by the new hospitalist on call that night. Do you know what happens if you stop your crohn's meds like Prednisone? You can die.

Anyway, back to the pain after surgery and the day after surgery...What happened was I had inflammation and fluid build-up in the kidney from after surgery that was causing more pain and bleeding. There are so many details and there's just not enough time to write it all here. But I needed pain meds to manage this pain and observation to make sure the other stones weren't coming down and that the inflammation wasn't causing any blockage.

 I will say that God did some amazing things, and breakthrough came. Many advocates (nurses and advisors who happened to know my dad- he is a teacher at the adventist school and the hospital is adventist, so he knows tons of people and has taught their kids- and the truth about who I really am) came to my side and defended me, and I ended up getting rid of the crazy dr. (after hearing many stories of the crazy things she's done, I hope she gets fired... we are writing a letter and one of the heads of the hospital who we know has already written her up). She was replaced by great doctor who listened, understood, and gave me what I needed to recover at the hospital. My urologist came back from vacation on Monday, and that's another story in itself also.... because I had told him about my body having horrible pain from the stent last time I had a stone removed, but things were not ready for me post-operatively like they should've been.\\

I will end with this quote:

"I find beauty in not only the beautiful things in life, but the bittersweet and sad as well. To me, there is something poignantly lovely about the human experience from its splendor to its grief. God created all our emotions, not just the happy ones, and for His good purposes. That's why a good cry can feel so good. And hitting our limits forces us to look outside ourselves for a Savior. It is in the plea, when we're at our end, that we can find that which is truly life-giving. Personally, my moments of deepest grief, deepest pain, have resulted in the most beautiful seasons in my heart. I've met God more intimately in those moments than in all the other pleasant ones combined. What isn't completely lovely about that?"

~ Leslie, http://topofthepagewithleslie.blogspot.com/

help

I just spent all of last night in the Emergency room trying to get help for this horrible kidney stone. I barely got any. Then they sent me home 8 hours later. Now, I am  finally at home, and the pain is just getting worse again. This is horrible. I don't have anyone that can help me, not even a hospital. Please pray for me.... I might need to have surgery to get this thing out, but the Dr.'s need to LISTEN TO ME.

Blessings and botox

My hubby got Botox today...But not for the "usual" reasons! (Not that I'm against Botox for cosmetic reasons, but we are NOWHERE NEAR the age to be thinking about wrinkles and sagging, and would never be able to afford this treatment if it wasn't covered by our health insurance.) Botox is now used as a treatment for chronic, severe migraines. So, he got poked a good 20-30 times around the head, neck & shoulders, and we're praying that in the next couple weeks, his headaches will go down in severity and frequency.

Last night was reading around over here and one of the projects this blog is doing is earning money for disabled people in poor countries who cannot even afford a basic wheelchair. One lady wrote about how thankful she was for her disabled daughter to have all of the opportunities for care, therapy, and having any/all medical treatments available here in America. I started thinking how blessed I am, even with all of my and my husband's health challenges at such a young age, to have access to many medical treatments that so many others do not have. Sometimes it takes months, years, to find a treatment or a medicine that works without having too many negative side effects, but we are blessed to be able to try them! I cringe when I look at the possible side effects of certain medicines I'm on, but I also know that without them I would not be sitting here on my couch.

When I think about how there are so many disabled people who do not even have access to a simple wheelchair and end up begging on the streets for money and food, unable to go anywhere unless someone carries them, my heart aches. I am so blessed to live in America. I admit that when I think of living in the U.S. and healthcare, I do not usually come up with the word "blessed". But you know what? It's true! I am blessed to have the health care that I have, even if I regularly pull my hair out over the expenses of it and the way that the insurance companies operate. I am blessed that my health insurance covers thousands of dollars worth of medicine & treatments that weren't even around 10 years ago! It is just a crazy thought.

So, to wrap it up, these were just my random thoughts for today. If you would like to learn about the Free Wheelchair Mission, visit this link. The blog itself (Life Rearranged) was really encouraging to find, because it focuses on having a place where people can come and share their stories of caring for someone with, or having Special Needs. Although I don't really fit into this category, it was inspiring to read a lot of these women's stories about everything they've gone through and how they still have hope through the darkest times in their lives.

If any of you have chronic health conditions, or children with special needs, I really recommend this blog. I do believe that God is good and faithful even through the hardest times in our lives. I believe He hears our prayers and answers them with His perfect timing, and I believe that the hardest things we go through can be the times that we can grow the most in our faith, our hope, and our perseverance.

I do apologize if I was rambling on and on as I am really tired and need to go to bed! I realize this was a rather un-entertaining post, but sometimes I just need to write about what's going on in my mind. I will try to incorporate more pictures and interesting stuff next time I post! :-)

~Melissa

I Can Eat Again!

I can eat some normal food now, thanks to God, everyone's prayers, and a little evil drug called Prednisone! Woo hoo! So glad for this after 7 days of mostly liquids-only. It gets soooo monotonous.  Yay for Costco rotisserie chicken and white rice for dinner! I'm hoping to continue on the path to getting over this flare-up and being able to eat more foods again, although I am still pretty limited in the foods I can eat even when I'm not flaring. Now, if this stupid new kidney stone will pass so I can get on with my life....

I saw this little survey on this blog, and it looked like fun so now I'm going to fill it out too!

 

 Survey Says.............

 

 

 1. What time did you get up this morning? 
Well this is embarrassing... but I've been having sleeping issues... I got up at 1:24 p.m. Yes. But I couldn't go to sleep until around 7 a.m, so I'm still really tired.


2. How do you like your steak? 
I don't eat steak. In fact, I've never even had a bite of steak. Not joking! I was raised eating vegetarian and certain meats just don't appeal to me, probably since I wasn't raised with them. My closest thing to steak would be eating an In 'N Out Burger, which I had for the first time a few years ago!



3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema: 

Ummm Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2.(My hubs
reminded me just now, lol)


4. What is your favourite TV show? 

It seems like all my favorites are either on break or have been cancelled, or the main actor has left (Steve Carell, nooooo!) but it was The Office, 24, The Middle, Modern Family, and White Collar for now. I can't pick just one! 


5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? 
Probably here, because I wouldn't want to be away from my family & friends. But, if we all moved to San Diego or Hawaii, I don't think I'd be upset! :-)

6. What did you have for breakfast?

Cream of Wheat. First solid(ish) breakfast in 7 days! No more Ensure for me!


7. What is your favorite food?
I love most italian stuff like eggplant parmesan, fettuccini alfredo, pizza, and peach cobbler a la mode, and so many things... I can't choose one. This seems to be a recurring theme in my survey. I can't ever choose just one thing!

8. Foods you dislike?
Raw onions, bell peppers, all seafood

9. Favorite place to eat?
Broadway Heights, Old Spaghetti Factory, Olive Garden, P.F. Chang's, Crush

10. Favorite dressing?

Well, since I can't eat salad anymore, it doesn't really matter... but I used to LOVE the italian dressing from Olive Garden! 


11. What kind of vehicle do you drive?
'02 Toyota Camry. So smooth & comfy to ride in (usually my hubby drives when we go somewhere, I don't get out as often with my health these days)

12. What are your favorite clothes?

Honestly, my sweat pants and a tank top. If I am at home, you won't see me in anything else! I hafta be comfortable.


13. Where would you visit if you had the chance?
An amazing tropical island like St. Thomas, also Hawaii, and Italy

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full?
I think it's funny when people say "overflowing!!!" so I'll say, "overflowing!!!"

15. Where would you want to retire?
Wherever my family & friends are, but I wouldn't mind having some amazing scenery around too!

16. Favorite time of day?
Anytime besides waking up in the morning. ;-)

17. Where were you born?
Angwin, CA (Napa Valley area)

18. What is your favorite sport to watch?
None! Well, only the superbowl because I try to find out about the players and that makes it more interesting. Oh, and maybe some gymnastics once in awhile.

19. What is your favorite fragrance?
It's kinda weird, but I love the smell of the plasticy blow-up rafts and toys in the summer, and the smell of my cats, and freshly washed sheets! lol

20. What is your favorite face cream?
I just realized that I answered this earlier as my favorite "ice cream" and then question #35 was that, so I went back here and had to change it! haha, I just use Cetaphil face wash and face lotion, works for me.

21. Favorite baby/kids products?
Don't know, I don't have kids yet.

22. People watcher?
Yep!

23. Are you a morning or night person?
Afternoon & Night.

24. Do you have any pets?
Yep, my two kids (kitties) Leila and Louie.

25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share?
I'm able to eat a lot more regular foods now, after 7 days of  mostly liquids!

26. What did you want to be when you were little?
An astronaut, piano player, or a nurse.

27. What is your favorite memory?
Our wedding day and honeymoon week. best.time.ever!

28. Are you a cat or dog person?
Both. But cats are easier and dogs need daily walks and a yard, so we only have cats right now.

29. Are you married?
Yes!

30. Always wear your seat belt?
Yes.

31. Been in a car accident?
Ugh I don't like to talk about that kinda stuff... I feel like I'll jinx myself or something... but I just trust in God to keep us safe every day and keep crazy distracted people off the roads!

32. Any pet peeves?
When people chew REALLY loud at the movie theater (or anywhere really...), drivers who cut you off just to get one car ahead

33. Favorite pizza toppings?
Cheese.

34. Favorite flower?
They're all so pretty, and the good smelling ones are the best. Roses and star lillies come to mind right now.

35. Favorite ice cream?
Right now, vanilla soft serve, and that last bite w/ the plain cone and the ice cream, SO GOOD!

36. Favorite fast food restaurant?
Ehhhh Subway I guess, or Chipotle... can't eat a lot of fast food stuff... grease hurts me, and I can't have lettuce, tomato, etc so I have to be creative.

37. How many times did you fail your driver's test?
No times

38. From whom did you get your last email?
I actually just got a reply e-mail from a blog friend, Hannah, how nice!

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
Geez I haven't been out enough lately... how about Target!

40. Do anything spontaneous lately?
Went outside and walked around for the first time in a week... it sucks to be sick!

41. Like your job?
Fighting this wretched disease is my job at this point. And I'm not very fond of it!

42. Broccoli?
Can't have it now. Sad. I used to looooooove steamed broccoli w/ mayonnaise... I know, sounds weird... but it's goooooood! I miss it! :-/

43. What was your favorite vacation?
Honeymoon in Santa Cruz & San Diego!

44. Last person you went out to dinner with?

Wow, it's been a long time since I haven't been able to eat real food... ummm... my hubster!

45. What are you listening to right now?
My hubs just turned to this old BeeGee's concert on tv, reminds me of when Jimmy Fallen and Justin Timberlake do that funny skit, have you seen it?

46. What is your favorite color?
I love teal blue and deep purple right now.

47. How many tattoos do you have?
Zero.

48. Coffee drinker?

Only white mochas and/or caramel frappuccinos sometimes; stuff like that. Never black coffee.

Hope you all have a relaxing Sunday and a great week!

I can't think of a title!!!

Well, I didn't end up having to go the hospital! I endured some of the most painful times of my life, and I've had a lot of them, bought I fought, and people prayed, and I went onto a liquid diet to help control the crohn's flare up. Right now I haven't really eaten since Saturday, except a couple of bites of Top Ramen and some Saltines, and even they don't do that well with my gut. I started the most evil medicine in the world (but the ONLY one that will help me), Prednisone, and I think it's finally starting to help. But the side effects, just to list a few, make it harder to sleep, cause anxiety & depression, can make me jittery, moody, cause weight gain, increase appetite, and cause a thing called "moonface" where your face swells up and makes it look like, well, a moon I guess... and these are only short-term side effects. But I am praying that I will get better on this low dose of Prednisone and then be able to taper off of it fairly quickly and not get all of those nasty side effects, including long-term ones like adrenal gland suppression, liver failure, etc... honestly, I am on a lot of meds that have terrible side-effects and I just have to trust God and know that it's better to be on these drugs than to be dying in a hospital room. God is in control of my life, and worrying will not add any days or minutes to mine.

I think I will end my post with a random list of things I'm feeling/doing/experiencing/wanting:

- I'm hungry, but the hunger gets less each day, because I think my stomach is getting used to liquids only and consuming less calories (I'm guessing maybe 1200-1400 a day).

- I was sooo happy to be able to eat some Ramen tonight, but a little scared that it'll cause more pain the further down it goes in my intestines.

- I have lost 10 pounds since Saturday, and that is about the only positive thing that has come from this flare-up.

- I don't even know if most people hear the term "flare-up" very often; it just means my crohn's disease (inflammatory bowel disease) is in its active stages and needs to be controlled.

- I missed my hubby a lot today when he went to work and came home late. Although I want him to be healthy and go to work, I have to admit I love having him home when I'm sick.

- Speaking of sick, I am getting sick of Ensure drinks, which are my only source of nutrition right now besides V8 Splash juice and the occasional saltine/spoon of Ramen.

- I really hope to be able to eat something new tomorrow, anything besides the things mentioned above.

- If anyone has any questions about what Crohn's Disease is, or how it affects me, I'd be happy to answer!

- I am SO thankful for my family, friends, church, etc. who are all continually praying for me.

- Playing with my kitties and focusing on anything besides myself helps me keep my sanity during the day.

I think I'll end here and go relax, read some blogs, watch tv, check my facebook, etc. Right now I have a feeling that things might be turning around for the good, and I hope that feeling stays. I know that God has never left my side, and even through the toughest times, He is watching over me and I am so blessed to have an amazing husband who stands by me through all of it with the most loving, compassionate heart. I didn't have crohn's before we were married, so I think God put us together to help us through these tough times in our lives (although sometimes I think he's a better caretaker than I am with him!)

Have a good rest of the week!

~Melissa

P.S. - I love this song and just remembered how encouraging the lyrics are, so I posted it here, but realized I can't listed to it right now or I will cry! Too many emotions over here!

Prayer Needed

Hey everyone, I just wanted to ask if you could pray for my husband and me. Alex wasn't even able to work his two days this week because of migraines, and even when he didn't have a migraine, he would have a full day of nausea/vomiting. As for me, I am having a huge crohn's disease flare up, and I'm having too much pain and bleeding to be able to manage at home. So I'll most likely be going to the hospital today. Please pray for peace & comfort (I hate the hospital and get lots of anxiety there from past experiences) and pray that my dr.'s will have the right treatments and also have understanding of my unique array of health issues.

My pain has gone down a tiny bit but it usually waxes & wanes, and when it gets bad, it's the worst pain I've ever felt all over my intestines. Like burning fire. And none of my pain meds help. I'm trying to be hopeful and I do trust in God, but I need lots of prayer and support right now.


Thank you all!

~Melissa

P.S. - unfortunately the hospital that I'll most likely be going to does not have internet access available to the patients (sooooo lame) but hopefully I'll be back on here soon.

It's Thursday, and I'm Alive...

At least, I think I am. It's 5:38 a.m. and I already got ready for bed, got IN bed, tried to sleep, read the bible a little, prayed, and here I am wide awake. I had to take some more sleeping medicine so hopefully it'll help soon... please? I need to get to sleep earlier than this! It's really been frustrating lately. Oh, and the 2nd part of the Daycation? Haven't had time for that in between all of this can't-sleep-until-7am business, the hubby-and-I-have-a-million-Dr.'s appointments combined, and not to mention I'm having some rectal bleeding issues again. And If I just grossed you out there, hey, it's a part of my daily life right now and it's really not pleasant, but this is my blog and I'll share about my butt if I want to! :-P haha. Man, it hurts though. If any of you moms out there have had hemorrhoids after giving birth, or just anyone has had them before, put your hands in the air, and wave 'em like you just don't care! Better yet, get a sitz bath and soak those suckers. Cuz that might actually help. Anyway,  this is kinda like hemorrhoids but about 80 times worse at the moment.

(This is from one of the amazing stores we went into on our "Daycation" in Old Town Sacramento.)



 Enough about my bum. I refuse to give it anymore attention tonight. I just need prayer that I can sleep better, at better times, and have more energy. A LOT more energy. Cuz right now I have about a 0.5 on a scale of 1-10! And I need to at least get up and do my chores! I need to exercise to maintain/lose the weight I've gained from my medicines and the side effects from them. Side note-We have been going on beautiful walks around the bike path right by our house that follows the creek, so next time we walk, I will bring my camera and maybe post some pictures!

Prayer for my hubby would be great too. He'll be getting Botox (yes, Botox!) injections for his Migraines next week and we're praying that it will give him significant relief, as he is barely able to work even 2 days a week right now. He also has a lot of different tests (blood test, sleep test, MRI, etc.) coming up, so pray that those would all go well and give accurate results. It's tough around here, but God is with us, and we do have eachother, and the laughter we can still have together carries us through day by day (and, of course, our family and friends...and our kitties. :-)

Summer "Daycation" (part 1)

Last Monday, the hubster and I decided to take a "daycation" down to Sacramento, CA to have some fun. One reason we wanted to do this was that my family was going on their yearly summer trip down to Southern California, and we weren't able to join them this year due to our health issues. (Bummer, but we will make up for it when we get better!) Another reason was that we needed to get out of the house and have some fun together! So we opted for a day out of town doing the things we love to do: driving, walking around/shopping in Old Town (there are some really fun stores there!), getting Starbucks frappuccino's, going to the movies to see Harry Potter, and eating Dinner at The Old Spaghetti Factory.  Here is are some pictures from Part 1 of our fantastic day!

                                           The candy store we went to.

 The hubster, picking out his favorite candy, gummies :-)

Salt-water taffy. And lots of it.

 Some of the beautiful old buildings in "Old Town Sacramento".

 ... more buildings...

 Horse & carriage!

Mr. (or Mrs., I didn't check) Horse, and the "driver". I love horsies.

Stay tuned for Part 2 of our little adventure! I better get to bed, as it is almost 2 a.m. and I have to get up at 6:45 a.m. to get ready for church and singing/playing piano on our worship team. Hope my hubby gets me some type of caffeinated beverage in the morning, or I might be falling asleep right in the middle of a worship song! haha... Oh, and I tried to make the pictures a little bigger, but then they didn't fit inside the darn lines of the center of my blog, so I had to size them back down. :-( , someday I'll get the hang of this blog design stuff!

Juicy Summer Goodness

One of my favorite things about summer is the amazing fresh fruit it brings. My hubster and I have been eating lots of cantaloupe and watermelon this week, and (surprise!) I got it from the local grocery store, and it actually tasted good! It seems like it's so hard these days to get good tasting fruit without going to the local farmer's market- which I know is the best way to get it, but I usually don't have the energy to get up that early on Saturday mornings! Okay, I'll admit it, we do have one more local farmer's market on Thursday evenings, but it is usually crowded with rowdy high-school kids and more geared towards socializing than actual local produce, arts & crafts, clothing, etc. So if I had to choose, I would choose to get up early and go to the Saturday one, which has not happened yet in my lifetime!

One more reason why I like summer fruit so much is that there are only certain kinds of fresh fruit that I can eat. With the crohn's disease, my gut does NOT like fiber. And sadly, fruit is full of it. But, melons are one kind of fruit that are soft enough for me to eat! So I'm enjoying them a lot. Next up on our fruit list, honeydew! Wow, I can't believe I just wrote an entire post on melons. Someone around here needs to get a life!

So, what have you been eating lately? Any summer favorites?

I promise, I'm not this girl... (also, some good news!)

Promise!!! ;-) I saw this video today and HAD to post it. I told my husband that I would never become a crazy cat lady. If I was single, well, that might be another story... just kidding! So here's the good news:  I finally passed my latest kidney stone today! To say it was painful is an understatement. But, by God's grace, I didn't have to go to the emergency room for management of the pain. It is really nice to not have to go to the hospital every time... hospitals are not fun, unless you've just had a baby! Kidney stones are not cute, they don't look like mommy or daddy, and they definitely don't have cute little clothes to put on their tiny bodies. Hey, I'm not in too much pain now, it's okay to laugh! lol. Really though, I will spare all of the stone pictures and details in case there might be someone who doesn't want to see a stranger's kidney stone on her blog (and why wouldn't you wanna see that?!?!)

It's The Weekend!

Saturday + a long week + headache = sleeping almost all day, hubby picking up pizza for dinner, and movie watching at night! Even my kitties were lounging around with me- pictures below! Tomorrow, I will accomplish something. (Fingers crossed!)

                                           Leila, getting her free massage

              Louie resting on dad's back; he lays down in the funniest places!

                                   Louie again... upside-down on the couch.

                             Brother and sister stealing our spots on the couch.

First Post

Hey all you people out there in BloggerLand! Or is it Bloggerville? Blogtown? As you may see, I am very new to this "blogging" thing. But, I got hooked once I started reading so many interesting, cute, funny, and encouraging blogs from different women near and far. So, I am attempting to put one together myself so I can share in the fun! I will keep this short since this is my first post.

Today was rough, I will be honest and say that the last few months have been challenging for my husband Alex and me. We've been battling lots of health issues lately. He is fighting chronic migraines, and I have been dealing with various issues, the foremost being my crohn's disease, my back problems, and chronic kidney stones (and of course my kidneys decided to start passing one today... BOO kidney stones!) Whoever said passing kidney stones are as painful as childbirth, well, I wouldn't know because I haven't given birth, but if anyone has had both, let me know! Then I can say I've pretty much given birth over 15 times! haha.

Well, I must go take a late shower, but I hope to figure out how to improve the look of my little nest on this big space of the web, so if you have any advice, please, please write me a comment or e-mail me and let me know! Thanks everyone!

~Melissa